A friend of mine that I have known since we were born is going to Mexico in five days to get married. She started dating her fiance when her and I were roommates so he was always around. He’s a great guy and I know that they will continue to be extremely happy together. It’s always nice to see happy healthy relationships. But there’s a small part of me (that isn’t really that small…) that wonders when it’s going to be my turn to be in a relationship that isn’t dysfunctional. And I can’t help but wonder, is it just going to get worse as I get older? I don’t want to be a desperate thirty-something who only thinks about coupling up but it may be starting now.

Can someone please smack some sense into my head?

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10 Responses to Neuroses

  1. boundkitty8 says:

    *sigh* me next for that smack

  2. dekucat says:

    Sorry, but I can’t help. It gets worse and worse and worse as you get older…

    Oh wait. Actually it doesn’t. My last three relationships have been quite normal, while my relationships in my 20s were a never-ending freakshow. Fear not! Of course, statistically I’m now a poor spinster destined to end up alone with only cats for company, but strangely I’m not too bothered.

    • Erin says:

      The thing is, I go back and forth from being fine with the idea that I’ll be alone forever, and thinking that that is a fate worse than death. Since the two ideas are at opposite ends of the spectrum, I wonder which one is my true feeling and which one am I faking?

      • dekucat says:

        I don’t think either is the absolute truth. I mean, after a few weeks of missing B like crazy and waking up in a cold chilly bed, I might think being alone forever is tragical. But give me a weekend where I’m forced to be cheerful and social 24/7, and you’ll see me craving eternal solitude and contemplating enforcing it with a rocket launcher.

  3. arwenoid says:

    Single = good. 🙂

    Am determined to be spinster. This is my new goal. Of course, this also means that my sister must be rich enough to support me, because I don’t trust CPP to be around by the time I’m Old, and god knows I don’t have nearly enough put aside…

  4. Erin says:

    I think it’s mostly that I’m missing the *intimacy* of a relationship. I still don’t want to be around anyone 24/7 but it’s nice to know that you’ll share your day with someone, even if it’s just on the phone or whatever.

    Damn, I’m emo today!!! It must be the weather. I’m SAD. (10 points if you get the joke.)

    • arwenoid says:

      That’s why I have a roommate. 🙂

      But yeah, I get what you’re saying — I often miss the intimacy of someone who’s not just a lover, but a good friend as well. Most of the people I can call on are definitely just booty calls. And that’s great, I don’t particularly want anything more than that with them… what I *wouldn’t* mind is someone who’s a little bit more.

      But at the same time, I don’t want someone who wants to hang around all the time. I had to cut off one of my booty calls because they got clingy. Cannot handle clingy. 🙂

      The catch with such mythical creatures that are both intimate & such without being clingy is that THEY’RE often looking for girlfriends, and when they find one, then you have to find someone new. Girlfriends often don’t like ex lovers lying around. Dang.

  5. starra74 says:

    I am the poster-child for “relationships not to have in you your 20s”.

    Then I had a pretty good relationship that didn’t work out for a multitude of good reasons.

    Then I had a pretty good relationship that was designed not to work out from the start.

    Then I met the SMT.

    As the person who met the guy and got married between 30 and 31 years of age, all I can say is “Fear not.”

    It’ll work out.


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