I started the new job today and I think I am going to be awesome at it.

Sir spent Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights with me, which will probably never happen again ever, but K was out of town and his truck broke down, both of which meant he stayed with me longer than he normally would. It was wonderful but I am also looking forward to having my bed to myself again tonight, and having Maia to snuggle with. He loves both Maia and Bosco but he is allergic to dogs so while he will snuggle them all day on the couch (after taking medication), he draws the line at sleeping with them. I admit that it is a little hard for me to lock Maia out of my bedroom when he is here, but since it’s usually one night of the week at most, it’s not as hard as it would be if it were more often.

We went to a play party on Saturday and did a whip scene. His leather whips that he ordered months ago had finally arrived and he was very excited to try them out on me. Apparently I was shrieking so loudly that the dungeon monitors came over to check that everything was ok (ie still consensual) twice. I have no recollection of this at all, being somewhat distracted by pain at the time *grin*. I did get my endorphin high but it wasn’t as long as previous times; I think this was because I had to take an ativan earlier in the evening in order to not have an anxiety attack. I’m doing much better than I was a few years ago when I couldn’t even socialize in small groups with very good friends, but clearly I am still not past the hyper anxiety in large gatherings. I’m not sure right now what the best way to deal with this is – manage it with ativan, or up my daily medication. Sir wants me to look into therapy but I’m really not stoked on the idea. I hate the thought of telling someone my deepest darkest secrets. It’s like, who the fuck are you and why should I tell you? At the same time, I don’t particularly like the idea of upping my meds either, and I prefer to use ativan sparingly.

I finally got my passport in my hand so I went over-the-border shopping with a girlfriend of mine. She’s actually my agility instructor but we have been becoming more close over the past couple months, which is awesome because I think she is fabulous. We went down to the outlet malls in Washington state on a whirlwind trip because she had a date that night and needed to be back in good time for it. I wanted to get some clothes to wear to my new job, and boy did I! $400 later but I came home with a whole bunch of stuff. I fell in love with a Coach bag, not because it is Coach but because it is beautiful supple purple leather. I didn’t buy it but I can’t stop thinking about it, so I may end up getting it after all on our next shopping trip. Because yes, we have already decided that there will be another trip in the fairly near future.

Two of my other dog girl friends (I think of my friends as belonging to either the ‘dog’ group or the ‘kink’ group) have started walking their dogs super duper early in the morning to get it out of the way when it’s cool, and so that they can just relax when they get home from work. Tomorrow I am joining them at 5:15!

Originally published at idle musings. You can comment here or there.

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